While Christmas can bring so much joy, love, and connection, it’s just as easy to lose sight of the small, simple pleasures that make the season special. Instead of savouring the twinkling lights or enjoying the laughter around the dinner table, we can find ourselves obsessing over whether the house is spotless, the food is perfect, or if everyone’s gifts are just right. Sound familiar?
The good news is, it doesn’t have to be this way. You don’t need to get caught up in the chaos or run yourself ragged to make the holidays meaningful. By taking a step back, shifting your mindset and embracing a few small but powerful changes, you can create a season filled with calm, clarity and joy. It’s not about doing less (although that helps!); it’s about being more intentional and focusing on what truly matters.
What if this year, instead of chasing perfection, you made space for connection? What if, instead of trying to meet every expectation, you prioritised what feels good for you and your loved ones? A calm and joyful Christmas isn’t about avoiding the busyness entirely – it’s about choosing how you navigate it. And with a few simple shifts, you can enjoy the magic of the season without losing yourself in the madness.
Focus on the whole page
If I handed you a white sheet of paper with a small black dot in the centre and asked you to describe what you saw, chances are you’d focus on the dot. Most of us do. We fixate on the tiny imperfections or problems in our lives and overlook the vast expanse of good surrounding them. This Christmas, practise shifting your focus. Instead of fixating on what went wrong – the slightly overcooked turkey or the one gift you forgot – take a moment to appreciate the bigger picture: the love, laughter and connection that make the season special.
Embrace opportunities for happiness
Happiness often feels fleeting, but in truth, opportunities for joy are everywhere. The problem is, we tend to get in our own way, letting overthinking or perfectionism block our ability to fully experience it. This festive season, give yourself permission to be present and open to joy. Whether it’s sharing a laugh with loved ones, enjoying a festive meal, or admiring the twinkling lights, allow yourself to soak in the moments that make you happy.
Check your urgency
Do you look at your to-do list and feel overwhelmed, regardless of whether it has five or 500 tasks? That urgency we feel often stems from deeper beliefs, like “I must get everything done perfectly” or “If I don’t do this, I’m failing” or “that person I value will judge me harshly if I don’t…”. Take a step back and ask yourself what’s really driving that sense of pressure. Are all those tasks truly urgent? By slowing down and reassessing your priorities, you can focus on what truly matters and release unnecessary stress.
Reframe ‘I have to’
Language shapes our mindset. The next time you catch yourself saying, “I have to,” try rephrasing it as, “I get to.” For example, instead of “I have to cook Christmas lunch,” say, “I get to prepare a meal for my loved ones.” This small shift can transform obligation into gratitude, helping you approach your tasks with a lighter heart.
Remember you are loved for who you are
The drive to be everything to everyone can leave you drained and disconnected from your own needs. It’s important to remember that you are loved not for how much you do, but for who you are. This Christmas, give yourself permission to pause and prioritise your wellbeing. By showing up as your authentic self, you’ll bring more to those around you than if you’re running on empty.
Consider your meaning maker
Have you ever worked yourself into a spiral over something, only to discover later you misinterpreted the situation? Our minds are meaning makers, constantly interpreting events – but they don’t always get it right. This season, before jumping to conclusions, pause and ask yourself if there might be another explanation. Practising curiosity instead of judgement can save you unnecessary stress and foster more harmonious relationships. It can help to remind yourself to deal with what is, rather than imaginings.
